As a Nurse Practitioner and a mom, so many different thought processes have gone on in my brain in regards to the current COVID-19 pandemic and I am sure I am not alone. If you had asked me 2 weeks ago what I thought about COVID-19, I would have told you that it doesn’t appear to be a big deal, if you are healthy and haven’t traveled to an affected area, you don’t have to worry. As a matter of fact, 2 weeks ago I booked a flight for me and my son to visit my mom in Florida over Spring Break. At that time, my biggest worry was telling my 5 and a half year old that he would be missing his 100th day in school celebration and his pre-K field trip to the police department all so we could visit grandma in Florida. At that time, I wasn’t concerned about the spread of COVID-19. Our plan was just to go to my mom’s, hang out, and go to the beach and nothing was going to stop us from that trip.
At the same time, about 2 weeks ago, I was having dinner with my girlfriends, both of whom work in education and had Spring Break coming up. My one girlfriend was all set to go on a cruise and at that time there were reports of 2 cruise ships quarantined due to COVID-19. The three of us spent an extensive time talking it over and really our biggest concern was the cruise ship being quarantined and her not being able to come home for 2 weeks. She was planning on taking it day by day as she had until 3 days before the cruise to cancel. Last week, she officially canceled.
Last week, I was still in optimism mode. I was still planning on going on my trip despite the beginning discussions of social distancing. I work in a privately owned occupational health/urgent care clinic and some of my patients would ask if we were concerned, what should they do, etc and I was still in the mindset of recommending they practice good hand hygiene, cover their coughs, stay home if they’re sick, but again, not to worry. We implemented screening techniques in our clinic. We upped our cleaning techniques in the clinic. We kept close watch on watch CDC and IDPH recommendations were for which patients should be tested. We attempted to order additional supplies to the best of our abilities, though a large amount, including masks, cleaning supplies, hand soap, and hand sanitizer were all on back order.
Then last Friday rolled around and some of our local suburban Chicago schools were beginning to close early, extending Spring Breaks. Later that afternoon, our governor spoke and announced all state schools would be closed for 2 weeks and we should all start practicing social distancing. The following days it really became apparent that there was no turning back as the governor began closing bars and restaurants to dine in patrons, public buildings began closing their doors, state parks and trails have closed, and the cases of COVID-19 in our area have begun to rise day by day.
Now is the point where I am going to be brutally honest. I am beginning to become concerned. Almost a little more than concerned, afraid. I’m afraid for myself and my fellow healthcare workers that there are not enough PPE supplies available to protect us from contracting the virus. I’m afraid for those who work in the hospitality industry who are not currently working as they have been shut down and now they may not be able to pay their bills. I’m afraid for the elderly including my mom, my in-laws, and my patients as they are all at higher risk. I’m afraid for my 5 and a half year old who just doesn’t quite understand what’s going on and may feel punished when I tell him that at this time it is not reasonable to play with his friends. I’m afraid how long this is going to last and where we go from here.
So many thoughts and fears yet as a mom and a nurse practitioner, I have to put on my brave face and my big girl pants and push through. If I can do it, so can you!
xoxo, Tara
That NP Mom 